Checking In; One Year After Completing the Florida Circumnavigational Saltwater Paddling Trail (a.k.a. the CT). Flashback to August 6th, 2021, the morning after ‘the big day.” I sat in an empty hotel room by myself, sobbing. The excitement, goal-setting, and anticipation that came with paddling the CT - gone, like a rug had just been ripped from underneath my feet. “Love the wave.” That is the seed paddling mentor Jill Lingard placed in my brain. And while Jill’s intent was to coach me in kayaking in surf-like conditions, never did I imagine ‘love the wave” becoming my personal mantra. Since completing the CT last August, my life has felt as if NOAA put out a perpetual small craft advisory with seas 2-4 feet, with crests at unknown heights, until you’re in the trough asking yourself ‘what the hell?”
What the fuck did paddling 1500 miles do to me? If it weren’t for my dear friend Mary Mangiapia (who competes regularly) making a comment on social media I would not have figured it out on my own. She made me realize I was not alone; I was struggling with what is known as “Post-Competition Blues”. Google it. It is the real deal, and especially prevalent Olympic athletes. My mind no longer had a singular focus and my healthy/fit body started slipping away from its peak nearly overnight. I suddenly felt empty without the challenges that the CT presented to me. And unbeknownst to me, a depression-like funk slowly seeped into my soul. When I started this blog more than two years ago, I told you that I was going to bare my soul, a true challenge for this introvert. But as I did, we connected, and many of you lived vicariously through my 1500-mile paddle. With me, you experienced the beauty of the unspoiled corners of Florida to the destructive impact of urbanization; ethereal calm waters and the unrelentless power of wind and thunderstorms; my love of salt and the yearning in my soul when I could not be with it; and now the journey of the crests and troughs of the waves of the post-CT journey. Last week, I was able to spend time in a remote unspoiled area of Florida where it all started. Paddling the Big Bend provided me the time needed to reflect on the impact "the wave" has had on this 62-year-old woman, who until 4 years ago, barely knew how to get into a kayak;
One year after completing the CT; It’s a milestone and frankly, I’m glad it’s here and gone. As I’m writing this final blog, the sea fog that has enshrouded me for the past year is lifting and there is a sense of renewed forward momentum.
‘Halfshell’ has been tossed in the surf, but with each wave, it has softened the rough edges of my shell. It has also made me stronger.
6 Comments
Steve
8/11/2022 08:10:54 am
A heartfelt ending to an incredible journey! Now you have time to go back and paddle all those special places you wished you could have spent more time at.
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Frank Oley
8/11/2022 09:53:14 am
Well done, but not finished. Your adventure did not end with the CT, that is only a chapter. You are not the person to rest on their laurels, and you certainly cannot end your blog like this.
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Karin
8/11/2022 02:28:52 pm
Thanks for sharing your heart. You’ve had to deal with a lot and through it all you have greatly helped the paddling community. You are amazing and an inspiration. Looking forward to seeing you in March at our Paradise Coast Paddlers Club Month long festival. It will be an honor to have you. 🤗 As always if you’re down in SW Florida I would love to paddle with you.
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Jan C
8/11/2022 02:59:10 pm
Dorsey <> I love your honesty! I also long to get in your face again and share life's moments, the great and those that suck. Finally I am going to Kayak again after my hip revision surgery! I will be heading up to West Jefferson Nc to once again paddle the NEW RIVER with my sister Linda and husband Fred. Of course, hauling my little camping trailer and stopping at Calhoun Falls to fish and paddle (aka PADFISH) Lake Russel l, a clean water lake of 42 K acres. No development around it. Camp on the beach for $30 bucks a night.day.
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Lynette Brown
8/12/2022 10:08:52 am
Job well done !
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June M Shepherd
8/15/2022 08:43:40 am
Love your reflection on your CT journey and that you've made so many new lifelong friends who are like family. Keep moving forward.
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AuthorDorsey DeMaster embraced kayaking after retiring from 38 years in aviation. She lives near Crystal River, Florida. Archives
August 2021
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